(notes and changes to be made in purple)
Page 1: Captain Taylor's space ship lay burning in a tangled mess on the rugged landscape of a far away planet. Taylor and his second in command Female 2nd Officer Watts cautiously wandered from the crash site.( - put more plant life in to connect the forest to previous scenes
- put supplies mixed in with the rubble
- spaceship fit inside frame?
- combine 2nd and 3rd middle panels?)
Page 2: A noise echoed from somewhere! The two pilots turned quickly fazer blasters firmly in hand.'What was that', Taylor exclaimed with fear in his eyes.
'Oh my Gawd.', Watts managed to get out...
(- why are they walking away from the crash site?
- looking for signs of life?
- water and food?
- planetary exploration?)
Page 3: ...as several horrifying creatures crashed out of the trees toward them.(- make it more obvious that those are trees)
Page 4: The pilots fired their fazer blasters frantically into the attacking aliens with no effect.'Run for it Watts!', screamed Taylor.
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